out of the boondocks and into the burbs...

National Pie Day- a recipe

2012-01-23T12:21:00.000-05:00

Pie is a very important food at our house. We even have a badger who's favorite food is pie. So, in honor of National Pie Day, and Jan's Make Ahead Monday, I stole a recipe to share with you. Yup, stole it just for you. And we're eating it tonight. No, you may not stop over.

Chocolate Pye (stolen from Two Fat Ladies)

Ingredients:

FOR THE CRACKLING CRUST:
6 ounces ground almonds
1 egg white
2 ounces superfine sugar

FOR THE TOPPING:
8 ounces plain chocolate, grated
1 pint plus 4 ounces (2 1/2 cups) double cream (or heavy cream)

Sliced almonds to top

Directions

Work the ground almonds, egg white, and sugar into a paste and knead into a ball. On a sugared surface, roll out to a round large enough to line an 8-inch nonstick flan tin, 1/4-inch thick and leave to dry for 30 minutes.

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F.
Place the rested pastry in the tin and decorate the edges with the finger and thumb technique. Line with foil (but no baking beans) and bake blind for 20 to 25 minutes. Watch carefully to avoid scorching. Leave to cool.

Melt the chocolate in a bowl set over hot water, then mix in the cream, stirring all the time to prevent splitting. Remove from the heat and, as the chocolate starts to set, beat the mixture to a light foam. Allow to cool for 1 to 2 minutes before pouring into the cooled crackling crust. Leave to set. Serve decorated with toasted almonds and yellow rose petals.

-> I was going to make mine last night after my showdown with LG (which PB proceeded to ruin by laughing hysterically). LG and I have a similar stubborn streak. When we get on a roll, we apparently give each other the same glare. Last night LG lost his rights to stories and songs. But after I finished reading and singing to little o, I heard a melody coming out of his room. PB had caved. I went in arms crossed, glaring, "Why is he getting songs? YOU'RE the one who took them away from him!" LG glared back at me, for ruining the guilt trip he was working hard to take PB on. I glared back. Apparently, a mirror glare, since PB started giggling, then outright laughing, then he had to put LG down because he laughed so hard at us (ok, me). Harumph. When I make the pye tonight, we'll see who gets any... Maybe you can come over, I'll have enough to share.

Wordless Wednesday

2012-01-18T11:04:00.001-05:00

might better be called speechless Wednesday at our house.

As promised:

Looks adorable, right? Semi-aquatic, even? Nope. He wore the goggles to "try them out" in the splash pad, then immediately took them off and cried at lessons.

Next week I will be ~~bribing~~ offering his instructor an extra $20 if he will take him before class and teach him how to put his head under water correctly. Alone, without 5 other kids watching. Hopefully the kid is game, and LG is willing to listen to someone who is not related to him. We'll see.

Happy Wednesday.

Random Tuesday Thoughts

2012-01-17T13:05:00.003-05:00

Seriously, it's already Tuesday? Or should it be only Tuesday? I can't tell anymore. The weeks keep backing up on me, along with the laundry. Meh. Go visit Stacy, she has action figure angst this week.

-> My clean bathrooms didn't last 20 minutes this weekend. I sent everyone out to play in the snow. I took me an hour to get all three bathrooms squeaky clean, top to bottom. Floors, toilets, tubs, everything shined. Nothing smelled. It was wonderful. Then, I went and sat and enjoyed my Clorox high. In that brief moment, all 3 boys came in, each picked their own bathroom and proceeded to make a freaking mess. Its seems like such a simple task, point and shoot. Whatever.

-> LG getting his Nutella fix this morning.

-> The upshot of me giving up on other people's goals? More time for me. More time to blog, more time to read, more time to relax with the boys. Less grumpy Mama, less lugging of undesired books, and less giving up of lunch hour. One day their goal will be mine, but not right now. Oh, and apparently more time to make fund raising phone calls for the church? What? How the hell did I get shackled to that? Sigh. If you see me come up on the caller ID, let the voice mail pick up...

-> My SIL and niece just had me read a modern day teen romance novel. Somehow I thought it was going to be more sci-fi, thriller-ish. Nope. Pretty standard teen novel. It was darn fun, though. Squee.

-> My co-worker thinks my latest voyage into weight control is hysterical. I've gone all high protein. Smoothies in the morning, bars in the afternoon. Cows and pigs are running screaming at dinner time. (and no worries, I'm following all the recommended "moderation" ideas. I keep an equal mix of Yoohoo and water, veggies and Twinkies.) I'm logging all the calories and other data in a spreadsheet. When she saw this morning's log, she almost passed out. 1120 calories before lunch. Seriously, people? How is this not working??? She's threatened to sell me to science.

-> Come back tomorrow when I hope there will be hysterical pictures. We got LG goggles this weekend, in hopes he'll willingly stick his head underwater. I'm not holding out hope, but the pictures will be hysterical, I'm sure.

Spin Cycle- Dreams

2012-01-13T12:34:00.003-05:00

Ack, I'm late! I really want in on Gretchen's first run at the Spin Cycle, so I'm hoping she's as nice about my tardiness as Jen was. Or maybe it would be better if she's not so that I have to get my act together! I'm going in whole hog, though, and even throwing up the button. See it up there. It's even a link. Maybe that'll get me in.

The inaugural topic was "Dreams". Which is fairly fitting considering PB and I had talked about dreams over the holidays.

Back story->

A good friend had some folks over to his house over the holidays. The guest made some disparaging remarks about the humble American Dream life- house in the burbs, two kids, dog, picked fence- you know what I'm talking about. Now, this is the life our good friend aspires to. The "dream" handed down to us from our parents. The guest seemed to think that throwing away the idea the dream was like shedding your childhood, becoming an adult and making your own decisions. The host seemed to think that growing up was accepting that the dream really is the good life. A difference of opinions, to be sure.

This is where the conversation started at home. PB wanted to know if I was happy with our life. Because, you see, I am living "The American Dream". I have a nice place in the burbs, two adorable-happy-healthy little boys, a few pets and a picked fence around my pool. We both have good jobs that we like. I am close to my in-laws (in both proximity and emotion), and I think that's great. My weekends consist of laundry, play dates and the occasional baby sitter. Most of you are familiar, because you're here, too.

I guess what PB wanted to know was do I feel like this is enough? Had I outgrown the dream? Was I itching to throw off the establishment and turn my family into a mini-revolution? The answer is no, I don't feel like I'm missing anything. I love my life. I wouldn't trade it, and I do think I'm living the dream- my version. My first response was that the first part of "growing up" is to realize that what your parents had, and what they gave you was really not only "not that bad" but pretty darn good. But that short changes a lot of people that I have respect for. People who have moved away from the traditional dream for good, in favor of forging their own path to happiness. And I think they're great.

We then went on to acknowledge that, maybe, just maybe this person represented the shift in America. There's nothing wrong with the house/kids/dog/fence dream. But it's not for everyone, and not every one can or wants to achieve that. People are happy choosing to be single, or live with their significant other in a studio apartment, or maybe buy a farm and raise pigs. The new status quo is that there is none. No one is right or wrong to live their life in whatever fashion feels right.

Which brings me to today. I think this shift in "the American Dream" makes some people uncomfortable. If we all want the same thing, we can all be compared. The euphemistic "keeping up with the Joneses". But when we acknowledge that people are different and want different things, and so many different things are available- how do you compare? How do you know if you've achieved? You really have to look into yourself and decide if you're happy with where you are and where you're going. And if not, don't look at your neighbor, look inside some more and change directions. Ouch, how uncomfortable and, at times, almost impossible. Far easier to say we should all be the same and remain comparable.

Am I simple because I've chosen the traditional path? Have I not tried hard enough to make sure my "inner me" is fully out there? My friend's guest thinks so, I'm pretty sure (yeah, they know me, too.) But you know what I think? Hells, no. I still wear my converse sneakers to play dates and that's good enough for me.

A picture is worth a thousand words...

2012-01-11T12:45:00.001-05:00

but a painting is a feeling that can't be described in words.

Far later than I should be doing this, here is a picture of the painting I commissioned from Michelle last summer (wow, that sounds all fancy, doesn't it? Like I'm a millionaire?)

I know, it's a stinky picture, and it will never convey the beauty of the work. But that's not the point here. The point is that it's a painting, not a picture. And that makes all the difference.

A picture would tell you the story of that moment, it would capture it in time. The flowers on the shirts would be clear, and the expressions exact. You'd know what they were thinking right then. But that's not what I wanted. I wanted a little more (how picky of me). I received a lot more. Michelle captured my kids at those ages, in general. LG's habit of playing with his clothes, little o's willingness to give the moment over to his big brother. Her painting gave me a "sense" of my boys, not an exact memory. Like the smell of a shirt that's been worn can bring you to a place in time, instead of just one moment. The smell of my Mom's perfume will bring back a closeness to her, but not a precise memory of something we ever did. That's what a painting like this does. We'll remember last spring, and our boys, not just this trip.

Originally, I was going to save this for Christmas. I was, I swear. I was going to hide it. But then I opened it. And I knew I couldn't. I had to give it to PB the minute he came through the door that night. He loves it. He told me the reason he never printed the picture is because part of what he loves about it was that it was taken on his cell phone, which gave it that "fuzzy" quality, and a printed picture would just make it look out of focus.

So, many, many thanks to Michelle. If you follow this magic link you, too, can have all sorts of wonderful information about how to get your own painting. Also, you can visit her blog and enjoy the rest of her world, too!

Random Tuesday Thoughts

2012-01-10T12:46:00.000-05:00

In the spirit of the new year, I'm going to try to be a little more reliable about my posting. It only took 10 days to get on that. More on that later. For now, read here than go visit Stacy at the button above. Yup, it's button. Look how easy I've made it for you. Now read on for random.

-> We went to a birthday party over the weekend, for an adorable, now 2 year old, friend. At one point in the party, while the boys were romping and rough housing, PB asked me, "Are we the only ones in the room who learned English as a first language?" MB replies, after looking around a bit, "Yup, I'm pretty sure we are. Oh, and the boys, them, too." My friend was born in Belarus, as were all of her family, and many of her friends. They speak Russian as their first language, and still speak it to each other. Even the babies. It was beautiful to hear. Like a party hosted by Boris and Natasha ;)

- As a side note: these people could tell you stories about living under Communism that would make you rush to New Hampshire and thank those bozos for making our country what it is...

-> When there is a lack of snow outside, a large Tupperware lid and carpeted stairs will do in a pinch. Word of advice, even if it's your idea, send your little brother down first. Mama is much less likely to send him to time out, since she knows he would never come up with such a hair brained scheme.

-> I find it very sad that Christmas is over. We took down all the decorations on Sunday. Not even a scrap left (unlike in past years, when the random stragglers that I missed the first time through stayed up until Easter...) The living room looks much bigger, almost empty. Our neighbors yards are just muddy and drab. January needs a better holiday to celebrate. Hallmark, get on that.

-> 2012 is going to be known as the year of slow moving resolve. I didn't rush out to change things on the 1st. Instead, I'm slowly deciding which things I want to keep, which I want to add, and which I want to get rid of in 2012. Note: these were all up for grabs at some point...

Keep: Job, blog, addiction to Coca Cola

Add: volunteering at church (see more on this below), ok, that's all so far

Ditch: other people setting goals for me that I'm not interested in achieving. That's so 2011.

So, yeah, you guys made the cut. I'm going to try to be better about at least 3 post a week. And with Stacey and Gretchen to shepherd me a bit, I think I can do it.

-> I have found my favorite cooking show of all time is on the Cooking Network. Two Fat Ladies. I loved them in their original run, and I love them more now. They cook wonderful looking dishes, in great locales, and they don't try to push their health care regime on you. (If I hear one more word about cholesterol, or fat free on the regular Food Channel I'm boycotting...) I love listening to Clarissa and Jennifer talk about cooking with "streaky bacon" or reminding listeners that their decadent desserts are a "treat".

-> People seem to be offended that I don't like Play Doh (or Magic Sand, or Floam). To me, it's just a stinky pain in the rear, with no real purpose. I have never bought a single can, but since people seem to think my kids need it, they give it to them as gifts. Even though they know I hate it. Then they wonder why it's still in it's box months later. Hmmmm. Now, don't get me wrong, I know my kids love it. They get it at school, or at other people's houses. Which is where I think it should stay. Think of it this way, I have two cats. Your kids come visit, and get to experience them. You don't have to worry about the clean up, the allergies, any of that. I enjoy seeing them interact with the animals. You keep the Play Doh. And the smell, the Lestoil to get it out of your carpet and the screaming when someone mixes colors. You get my kids smiles and creative fun. Fair?

Ok, enough for today. Go visit Stacey. Feel the love.

A new year...

2012-01-03T13:14:00.000-05:00

in which I vow not to make any vows. My theory on this year is that if I expect nothing, I can't be disappointed, only pleasantly surprised, right?

->Whew, vacation was a whirlwind. It started off slow, with a visit to the library. Where I was promptly put in place by the stay at home mommies. Who think I should have realized that there is an early morning Sign Up for all activities (including the Sing and Dance we were hoping to attend). They also tended to believe that the spots should be reserved for the "usual attendants" rather than having to put up with the kids who are normally in day care at that time. Poor them. In the end, we didn't make any rude comments, handled the disappointment of not getting to dance rather well, and instead got out some books and CDs. The boys were rather proud of me, I think.

->I'm vowing that next year I will limit the time I spend on give away crafts to under an hour per gift.

These lovelies were well appreciated, but a pain in the tush to make. All the cutting and pasting is well beyond my patience (just ask the people on FB).

->I will post light saber pictures as soon as I figure out what camera I took them on. Must be the fancy one, because I can't find them now. Rats. No one was grievously injured by them, and the only fighting was because there weren't enough for everyone to have an all out battle with. He, he, he.

-> Yes, Sprite's Keeper, I should have cropped this bad boy. I don't have time right now, though. It's still cute, right?

-> To the man at the mall who stopped me to tell me little O would be a movie star someday. Was that a wish? A prediction? A random comment? Should I use the 529 for a cruise, or were you just being nice?

-> I have a dilemma of the nostalgic kind. One of LG's friends has a mom I would love to be better friends with. She's funny, sarcastic, honest and I think we like a lot of the same things. We took the kids out for a play date one day over the break, and we had a great conversation at lunch while the kids played. It was awesome! I would love to call her to go out some time. There are two problems: 1. Making time. Between her kids' activities and my kids' activities and all the other stuff we both do, I'm not sure how we would get there (this play date was planned in September!) 2. Time. Right now I try not to take too many "nights off" from the boys. I'm away from them all day, I hate not to see them at night. When I do break away, I like to see all the people I'm ALREADY good friends with for a drink, or coffee or whatever. To skip over them for a new person feels like they'll get even less of me than the pathetic little they already do! Ugh. But I really want to. I'm working on a plan, but so far, nothing.

-> I contemplated being a stay at home Mom this weekend. Then I had my coffee and the urge went away.

-> This year before I pack away Christmas, I'm getting rid of all the decorations I don't use. I don't care who gave them to me, or for what occasion. We have TON of stuff that sits in bins in our basement. Candle holders and snow globes, things that light up and sing. None of it every gets displayed. So? I'm Goodwilling it for someone else to enjoy. No guilt. I hate having to dig through it each year to find the stuff we actually use, and then swearing when something inevitably gets broken. Clean start for next Christmas, I say.

-> Ok, back to the grind for me. Stuff to do, people to see.

Best wishes to everyone for a healthy, happy new year. May you have success in all of your endeavors.

I have been remiss.

2011-12-13T13:08:00.000-05:00

It has been a unusual December so far. There has been a lot going on, but not the normal going on. More exhausting goings on, actually. Cripes. I'm going to pony up some random for you, though.

-> I just bought my children and random assorted others light sabers. Because nothing says, "Merry Christmas" like arming the minions.

-> Our pool deck is finished (mostly). Finally. In December. I spent a month with a huge mud pit behind my house, constantly yelling "Take off your muddy shoes the second you step through that door! No, don't splash in the puddles." It was not fun. I refused to clean my kitchen floors until it was over. All I have to say is that everyone I know is invited to swim in that damn pool. Spend all day there if you want. Wear you Speedo, what do I care? Hell, if I put the cabana bar out, I might let people move in. It had better get a lot of use...

-> I started a new project at work that is keeping me busy (mostly because I don't know what I'm doing and have to figure it out...) I still do all my old work, but now I get to do this new stuff, too. It's keeps it exciting. Kind of like those days when you wear all black and put on red panties.

-> One of these days someone is going to make a weight comment to me, and I'm going to answer in kind. Because it is the holiday season, and there are cookies and cakes everywhere, I partake. And people love to point out that I can afford it. I thought weight was a taboo subject. So, why don't we just all avoid it and stop pissing those of us trying to gain some off, huh? And give me that cookie, damn it. I need it more than you do.

If our library served dinner, we'd go every night.

-> The boys have reached new peaks of antagonizing each other.

MB: What flavor milk do you boys want with lunch?
LG: Strawberry.
Little O: Chocolate.
LG: No! Strawberry! I want Strawberry!
Little O: Chocolate. I gets Chocolate. (insert foot stomp and ferocious face, with arms crossed)
LG (now on floor, writhing in agony): Nooooooo! Strawberry!
MB: STOP.THE.YELLING. You can have different milk. It's not a big deal. Stop fighting!
LG: Noooooo!

And yet, the other morning, little o woke up first. I sent him in to get LG. He climbs onto LGs bed, LG grabs him by the neck, rolls onto his stomach with little o underneath him and proceeds to snuggle o. Like he was a stuffed animal. Little o didn't mind. I give up. I just don't get it.

Ok, I'm done. I need to go read stuff. And get my learn on.

MB is not exactly sure...

2011-11-23T12:52:00.001-05:00

what kind of example she's setting. But for a good reason.

A few weeks ago we signed up for our winter meat CSA. Normally, we buy most of our meat (beef, chicken and pork) from the farmer's market. The last week for that was last Saturday, since, well, it's cold outside. In order to get his customers through the winter, our meat guy set up a CSA program. I don't like it as much, since it requires more planning and skill (for the CSA he gives you what he has, normally we select what we want) but it's still far better than the market. Anyway, the meat guy schedules a pick up time, and we all flock like idiots to meet him and get our meat. Behind the Trader Joe's in our neighborhood. Kind of like a crack deal. Money is exchanged for goods. With no proper "store front", just the back of his truck. We try not to appear conspicuous, since I'm pretty sure TJ's would rather us buy their meat, inside the nice heated store. What they sell is mostly krappe, too, though.

Last weekend I added another such arrangement. Sigh. Our apple guy plans to keep us happy through the winter in a similar fashion. He'll send out an e-mail and tell us what he has. We tell him what we want. Then we show up behind TJ's, acting all covert, and exchange $$$ for appley goodness. How sketchy is that?

BTW- I'm not sure either of these exchanged is completely legal. I'm fairly sure that you are only supposed to sell goods from your own space (my normal CSA I pick up at the farm). Now, I know both these farms are inspected and all that stuff. The food is good to go. It's the method of exchange that I think the state would have something to say about.

What am I teaching the kids, though? That in order to get the good stuff you need to know someone and make arrangements that involve parking lot deals? If you can buy it in the market it's probably not good for you and overpriced? That sounds like an endorsement for nothing good, I tell you. When my kid shows up with a dime bag of "oregano" and says, "Look, Ma, I trust this guy. I've tried his stuff before and it's good quality. The government should just make this legal and easier for everyone to get access to." how do I come back? ""No, no, little o, that's only for meat and produce! For pharmaceuticals you still need to trust the government and stick to doctors, insurance companies and pharmacies that are trying to rob you blind and not really cure what ails you?" Yeah, it's a tough one, right? (note: I fully expect little o to be the one who does illegal things. LG has a glass face, and cracks easily under pressure. Little o knows the power of a cute smile and silence. I'm on to him already...)

Anyhow, I just wanted to say this year that I'm thankful that there are a lot of people out there willing to go the extra mile, but their butts on the line and work like dogs to make better food available for my family and me. We've come a really long way in just the two years I've been paying attention. If they keep up the fight, and we keep supporting them, hopefully one day we'll go from back alley to store front again.

Happy Thanksgiving to each and every one of you (even the Canadians, eh!)

Random Tuesday Thoughts...

2011-11-22T12:24:00.001-05:00

Ok, this week I'll give you a Tuesday. Since it's a little slow around here. Stacy is still letting us into her place, but wipe your muddy feet first.

-> I took LG to see his first movie in the theater last night, The Muppets. He LOVED it. He sat between me and my brother in law (his choice of seat) for almost the whole show (as it crept towards 9:pm, he climbed up in my lap and wrapped my scarf around himself). He shared my BIL's popcorn happily (he'd never had it before) and slurped on his chocolate milk. And he knew to sing quietly to himself when he recognized rainbow connection. ;) Success.

-> I think LG might have passed out of the worst of the terrible 3's. Don't quote me on that (and I'm sure I just jinxed myself). After a couple of horrible weeks of escalating fighting, and hitting, and in general unacceptable behavior, we're down to a low roar (back to pre-3 status). Which is good because I'm pretty sure neither PB or I was going to last much longer. I was googling "Gypsies" just to see what they were offering.

-> See, this is why I've stopped blogging every day. My mind just completely blanked on thing I could tell you that have any kind of worth.

-> I can tell you about my pool project, but do you really want to hear that my back yard is a mud pit and I can not discern any noticeable improvement other than they took down the horrible fence.

-> Or I could tell you that PB has (predictably) taken over my project on the downstairs bathroom and is set for completion over the long weekend. My bathroom will be a color called "Pooh Corner". We don't shoot for high profile humor at our house. Poop jokes go a long way with boys.

-> Does anyone else have holiday/vacation angst? I worry before my vacation and all through it that I won't enjoy it enough. I want those days to last longer than they do, and I want them to be great. So I worry about it. Which completely ruins the time off aspect of it. Because my mind is out to ruin my good time.

-> I should probably thank all the other parents in LG's room for being so screwed up. I know PB and I are not perfect, by a long shot. We turn things in a day or so late, with an apology. When we get the call to pick up our sick kid, it can sometimes take us more than an hour to coordinate (it can sometimes take them more than an hour to reach us...) My kid is not always behaved, not always dressed appropriately. He doesn't always get enough attention at home. But when the teachers tell me we're in the top 5% of parents in the room? Whew, you folks are setting the bar way to low.

Ok, that's enough for the day. I might try to come back tomorrow and do a little Thanks thing, but don't push it.

Stand back...

2011-11-16T11:48:00.001-05:00

I need to rant for a minute. I know, quit your complaining. I haven't given you anything for a week, and now I log on to complain? Well, it's my blog...

Here's my problem: vanity sizing. Yes, now I know the name of my current nemesis (thanks to a co-worker with a similar complaint).

When I was in high school (a scant 20 years ago) I was a size 2. It's a real number. No, there were no sizes smaller. But it fit. It wasn't baggy. Not loose. Sometimes I was even a size 4. I could find clothes at almost all major stores. Please keep in mind that I am 5' tall.

Today, I weigh the same amount and am the same height. Last night I went to a common store, slightly upper end. I tried on a size 00. What the hell is that even? That's negative! I'm not even a nothing, I'm a double nothing??? That's freaking ridiculous. And for stores that choose not to stock ridiculous sizes, I just can't shop there anymore (this is many, many places and ALL discount stores- Target included). It makes me angry to no end.

How is this possible? What the hell happened? I'll tell you. In an effort to keep people buying more, labels have changed their sizing standards. Because the baby boomers (yup I just pointed a finger) and the gen xers (because why should the boomers take all the blame) refuse to acknowledge that they are getting older, changing shape, and maybe, just maybe letting themselves go a little, and the marketing people stepped up to the plate to accomodate them. So, even though you have gained 20 pounds in the last 20 years, and your backside has slid south, you can be the same size 6 you were in 1980 before you had those 3 kids! No need to cut back on the Thin Mints or do more than walk the dog. And those of us who's body type runs small? We're relegated to shopping on line so we don't make people feel bad... It just pisses me off.

Oh, and to the next person who points out that Marilyn Monroe was a size 12? She also was about 5'5" and weighed a 120 lbs. She'd be about a 6 now... Stick that in your Starbuck's mug and sip on it.

Ok, I'm done now. I feel a bit bad for this rant, since I know so many people who are trying hard to eat right and be healthy to get back into their 1980's jeans. But we hear from those folks a lot, so I thought I could take just this one post to get my angst out there. To make up for it, have these:

Random Spin Cycle

2011-11-01T12:41:00.000-04:00

We're multi tasking this week since it's my last day in the office. I could tell you where I'm going, but then I'd have to kill you (I'm an auditor, remember? We live for the element of surprise!)

To satisfy my spin for the week, I give you these:

Little o as Blue MM

This was the no effort, store bought costume. Little o didn't seem to notice. Don't ask why he looks like he's going to sneeze, I don't get it either.

LG as the Orange MM- the front

LG as orange- the back..

So, the only M&M costume I could find for LG was the green M&M. And green is a girl. I tried to fake it, since green is his favorite color. He was not having it. He knew Green is a girl. He wanted to be Orange. The guy with the pretzel in him. He's never eaten one, but he knows that is what he NEEDS to be. Sigh. So I turned a $6 store bought green into a $25 semi-home made (Sandra Lee would be proud) Orange M&M. The front- orange with the face. Pretty easy. The back- black with a glow in the dark pretzel (it's supposed to be an x-ray). All in all, I think I did ok. It looked home made, but not all jacked up. Success. People thought they were adorable. I concur.

-> Much to the happiness of many parents, I got into it with a group of teenagers while trick or treating. Story: They had been following us for a few houses, and finally caught up. 3 of the 6 were not dressed, two were fine and 1 was "scary". She was leaning towards little kids on the sidewalk and moaning and such. So, I politely asked if they could hold up a bit, so they would miss the little guys. Scary girl looks confused and then offended. SG: "Halloween is scary. They're supposed to be scared." MB: "Halloween is also supposed to be for little kids, not teenagers old enough to get a job and buy their own candy. Scare the baby and you'll find out how scary I can be." They waited, and her friends laughed hysterically at her. Good for them.

-> Apparently, I've had pie for my first two meals of the day. Think I can totally screw nutrition today and go for the third? Mmmmm, pie.

-> I'm tempted to un-friend an old friend on FB. I'm tired of his "Occupy Wall Street" rants. He chooses to have a krappy job because he's "following his heart". Which is fine. But don't blame others for following their wallet. We all make choices.

-> If you have a kid under 4 or so, you need to read No Sleep for the Sheep by Karen Beaumont. It is hysterical. And I've had it going through my head for a week. It replaced Veggie Tales, though, so it's still a win.

Ok, I have stuff to do (like find out how to pay my cable bill. yes, I know that paying my bills means the cable company wins. But I like Tivo, so I'm ok with it.) Have a good week, all.

Spin Cycle- Halloween then and Now

2011-10-28T08:16:00.003-04:00

Don't laugh. My "then" is only four years ago. Really. Sad, huh?

How is it when you have only one small child, everything seems overwhelming? Getting to the grocery store requires Herculean effort, never mind pulling off a holiday. One that requires a costume. And bring treats to school? Holy cows. Why would anyone even expect this of you? Of course, you call in reinforcements. Thank god for sisters (in-law, in my case).

LG as a Lion. King of, well, everything.

Then your kid turns one. And it gets a little easier, but really the challenges just shifted. Now you have to wrestle someone into a costume, and if they don't want to be a lion at that precise moment, good luck with that.

Some how, with two, it got easier. Don't ask me how. I think it's magic of the dark variety. But taking both boys last year. Not really hard at all. Maybe it was the age, and not the number of kids. Who knows? All I know is that LG walked the whole way last year, and when we finally arrived back at my SILs house? Even I was tired from walking.

The little angel and the handsome devil.

This year? We'll see. The costumes are almost finished. The pumpkins are carved. Treats for school are purchased. Trick or treat arrangements are set. Halloween? I can handle this one. Don't ask about Christmas, though.

I'm not really here...

2011-10-25T12:20:00.004-04:00

this is just a figment of your imagination. Because God knows I have about 1,000 more important things to do than blog during my lunch hour. Like order the boys school lunches for November, or call the doctor. I'll get to those eventually, though. For now, time for you, some Random Thoughts, and Stacy (who should just declare Tuesday her day officially!)

-> We have officially survived many plagues at our house this month. EVERYONE had something. It was less than pleasant, but somehow we did not miss a single event. (Though we did bring an absolutely miserable little o to a birthday party this weekend. What? Like you've never done it? He wasn't contagious, for God's sake.)

-> When you call the gas company and tell them that you smell gas sometimes by your backdoor, they declare a "gas emergency" and rush to your house with the fire department. Then they yell at you for not calling them last Fall when you first smelled it, even if you don't smell it all the time. Don't ask me how I know this. Just call them when you smell gas. Trust me.

-> My kids think their vitamins are treats. It's hysterical. They beg to get a gummy "treat" every morning and afternoon. I'm screwed when they figure this whole thing out, aren't I?

-> This is what I parked next to this morning:

I almost parked one space over just in case wanted it's own space. It looked like it might threaten me with a strong NY accent.

-> LG has begun to swipe my phone and play angry birds. He's better than I am. Sunday I was singing the Veggie Tales song (because I can't get it out of my head). He corrected me on the words. When we watched later in the afternoon he said, "See, Mama, I was right. They say squash, not cucumber, in the song". I'm not sure whether or not I like this trend. Three is a little too young for children to outgrow their parents.

-> Top Three things I Hate About the Cold Weather:

1. Tangled laundry. With short sleeves and shorts, the laundry is easy. Now that we have long sleeves and pants every thing gets tangled in the wash as it spins around, and you have to pull it all out carefully lest you stretch out and arm or a stocking leg. Blah. What a pain.

2. Having to step on the cold bathroom floor in the morning. You can keep the bathroom lights as dim as you want, but the minute you hit that cold tile floor you are AWAKE. again, blah.

3. Factoring in an extra 7-8 minutes to get out the door. In the warm weather it's "Get your sandals on, we're leaving." Find sandals, put on, leave. In the cold weather it's "Get on your shoes and coats, we're leaving. What do you mean you can't find your socks? Why did you take them off? Why are you wearing his fleece? Don't put your socks on your hands!" Grumble, grumble, grumble.

-> I am loving Christina Ricci in Pan Am. I wasn't sure I'd like it, but yup, I do. Definitely one of my favorite new shows.

-> Little o has discovered how to play the blond card. When he wants to, he'll completely ignore what you've asked him to do and simply smile sweetly and bat his eye lashes until you do it for him. I've asked the teachers at school and they've fallen victim to it, too. If he starts to flip his hair and giggle, it's all over.

-> We took our weekend guest to the Cleveland Museum of Art over the weekend. This is the only picture I took. I'm not sure how armor counts as art, but it was fun. Uhm, the other art was, too, I swear.

-> Goofy boys in Mickey Mouse hats. Just because.

Ok, I really need to go do stuff now. Have a good week!

2011-10-24T06:52:00.000-04:00

Ok, I won't get into where I've been for the last week. You don't want to know. But I'm here, and I've managed to hook myself up with Grandma, over at Grandma's Goulash again this Monday! The rules are less than 120 for a Microfiction.

Edith was so embarrassed. No matter where she took Eddie, he always managed to make a scene. Ewww. (that's an even 100 right there, thanks).

Have a good week, all.

Spin Cycle- Dream Date

2011-10-07T08:42:00.002-04:00

Ahhh, to dream. Jenn over at Sprite's Keeper wants us to describe a dream date. One we've had, or one we want. So all week, I've been mulling over the dream date.

My first thought is of Fantasy Island. Remember that 70's sitcome with Mr. Rourke and Tattoo? Where someone would come to the island and talk about their "fantasy" and it would come "true" only to find out how horrible that would be and them wanting to rush back on the plane and go home? 70's TV did a lot to shape how I think of the world. Not all of it positive.

I've been on some rather nice dates, but nothing that people would dream about. Posh places with good looking mens and all. But not the stuff dreams are made of. So, nix writing about any of them.

Onward, then to the dream of the future. Some place I want to go, something I want to do, someone I really want to spend time with. I had a few ideas, but I keep coming back to the same place.

I'm so tired, and it's been so long since both PB and I could take a whole evening off that all I want is a nice night of sitting on the couch with him. Boys quietly up in bed, some of our favorite shows on the Tivo, and two pints of Ben and Jerry's (Midnight Snack for me, Chubby Hubby for him). No worrying about if the amount of the bill is in our budget, no needing to get back to a sitter, or worrying if everyone went to sleep ok. No feeling bad because most of what we talk about when we're alone is the boys, or the project list, or work. (do you do that? do you go out and feel like you should forget all your daily woes and enjoy your self only to find out that you'd rather just be talking about the day to day krappe?) Just PB, and I, a kitty keeping us snuggly, and maybe an episode of Chuck. We'd laugh, eat ice cream and snuggle. The best part of this dream, it that it stands a high chance of coming true. Maybe not for another few weeks, but soon.

I was going to skip this story, but meh, you're still here, so I'll tell it. PB and I went out for our anniversary a few weeks ago. To a restaurant we've wanted to try for a few years. Their schedule is... inconvenient for us, though. The stars aligned, and our sitter offered, so we got to go. Best. Steak. In. Ohio. Hands down. And while we were there, after the usual talk about school, tests, the boys, the house and other sundry krappe, we had an interesting "dream" discussion. PB wants to build a greenhouse in our backyard some day. He wants to grow "exotics" and he hopes I'll come along for the trip, because I can grow a mean violet when I'm motivated. Which is funny because I would love a butterfly garden (which has to be indoors since we live in Ohio). How fun would that be? The two of us out in our greenhouse puttering around in December with our plants. I throw this out there since we're talking about dream dates. And I'm pretty sure I'd never fit this in anywhere else.

Ok, back to reality. Blog dismissed.

Say Cheese...

2011-10-05T14:28:00.001-04:00

This is what you get when you tell two tired, hot, little boys to hold their brother's hand. Ahhh, family memories. It was a Kodak moment, clearly.

Kind of sad...

2011-10-04T15:35:00.000-04:00

I don't talk much about my work. Mostly because there's not a whole heck about the work to talk about. What is rather interesting is the family I work for. I've blogged before about the three brothers. But I don't mull over them frequently. I do think quite frequently about one of their off spring.

The oldest brother has kind of a sad family story (apart from his amazing brothers). He and his wife led wonderful lives, but their children- not so much. Their only daughter "died" when she was only 25. No one here is quite sure how. Mysterious illness (it was in the 60's, so this is completely possible). Suicide? Could be. We'll never know, I'm sure. It's their son I think about, though.

Here is a young man who would have had the world. His father was a billionaire business man. He flew from NY to Cleveland to Florida to Europe on whims. His mother was a beauty. But their only son has Down Syndrome. Rather severely, if the doctors reports are accurate. He will permanently be 4 years old. Now, this in itself does not make me sad. I know a few people with Down Syndrome who I think live really happy, fulfilling lives. (one makes eyes at LG during church each week.) This boy had led quite a sad life, though. At least to me, it's sad.

Because he was born in the 50's, the doctors convinced his well to do parents that he would be much better off in an institution. They couldn't possibly care for him in their home. He'd be happier at a "facility". And so he has been. For the last 60 years. He's lived at a few places, all rather posh, but still institutions. He never had known a "family" life. Which gives me a pit in my stomach. His father used to visit him regularly (at least monthly), but since he's passed, cousins and sometimes his Aunt go visit "when they can". They send gifts on his birthday, and holidays. But they are not there to see him open them. He lives with nurses, and health aids. His friends are other people who mostly do not know a life at home. They all have each other, which is something I guess.

But when I think of him, my heart sinks. Because he has the mind of a 4 year old. Which is an amazing thing. LG is not yet 4. He understands family. He understands home. And I don't mean as a building. He understands that home means comfort, and Mama and Papa, home means good smells and hugs and little brothers and being safe. He knows that home is not just a place. He knows that he feels different about home than he does about school. (side note: for the first time in his life, last week LG realized that when he felt sick, all he really wanted was to go home) At 4, you understand feelings. At 4 you know you are a person separate from your parents. You begin to understand the world. You can feel hurt, or slighted, or insulted. When you say, "He has the mental capacity of a 4 year old." it doesn't really sound like much. Unless you know a 4 year old. 4 year olds dream amazing things. Airplane rides and jungle adventures. When you're 4, everything is possible. And when someone tells you it's not? 4 year olds don't really understand that.

It kills me to think that this poor little boy (because even though he's nearing retirement, he will always be a little boy) has lived his whole life taken care of by strangers. That he relies on their kindness to make him feel better when he's sick, or feel special on his birthday. I see people with special needs all the time, with their families. You hear the stories on the news of their success. But here's a little boy, with all the money in the world, but no one to really love him. And quite frankly, though I never had the chance to meet his mother, I can not for the life of me understand how she let this happen.

Random Tuesday, what, huh, something shiny?

2011-10-04T13:43:00.002-04:00

I have tried to write this post at least 4 times today, only to get distracted the minute I open my web browser. But not this time. This time I actually got Blogger open. And I'm typing. Ha!

-> Two Saturdays ago PB and his brother and brother in law started to put a new roof on the garage. They were up there ALL DAY. In the mean time, laundry got done, LG went to a birthday party and life continued. People wandered in and out all day. Messes were made, some were cleaned. My MIL came to watch little o. My SIL came to, well, frankly, she came to hang out, I think. All was good and right. Except for the guys on the roof, we had a good time. Then Sunday morning came. The roof was not finished. The house was a mess. MB was slightly peeved at the situation. Not so nice thoughts passed through the badger mind. Then I realized I hadn't had coffee yet. Problem remedied. Suddenly, the roof became "mostly done" and the mess was cleaned with no further grumping. It never fails to amaze me how caffeine can improve my mood. My kids become cuter, my job is almost enjoyable and unicorns fart rainbows wherever I go...

Is this what they call smoldering?

-> Our house project list (the one we started when we moved in) will be reduced by two large projects at the end of the month. We will have a new roof on the garage (see above) and a new pool fence. I hate this list. Mostly because it started with 5 or 6 items, and almost all of them are still there. They are BIG items. And something else always comes up that needs the money. "We're doing the back deck next summer." Becomes, "Well, we need a new snow blower and two trees need to be removed." This list is my nemesis.

Every one's all American...

-> Hallelujah, we have a convert. Last winter I dragged a semi-willing PB into the land of the CSA. He griped. He worried. It was expensive, and did we really need all those vegetables? Would we remember to pick it up? All worries I said I would take care of, I promised I would make good. As with many experiments this year, he let it happen mostly because he doesn't have the time or the energy to argue with me. BUT, I did make good. To the point that this conversation happened last week:

MB: I'm kind of sad that this is our last CSA pick up.
PB: Our last? I thought they went until the end of October!!!
MB: No, they go until we get the poundage they promised. We're actually about 10 lbs over.
PB: Well, next year I think we should change it a bit.
MB: You didn't like #####'s? I thought it was a good deal. And convenient.
PB: No, no, we'll do theirs again. Do we need another, though? I hear they have some in town that have different stuff. We need to talk to my parents, too. Maybe get a full share and ####'s and split it with them?
MB: silent. maybe on floor, in shock. The man who has been quoted saying, "Vegetables aren't food. They're food for food." wants to join not one, but two CSAs next year.

-> I love listening to my co-workers complain about the weather. We're inside for 10 out of the 12 daylight hours of the day. Why does it matter if it's raining? You wouldn't be able to enjoy the sunshine anyway...

Ok, enough of my happiness and light. Go see Stacy and Random Up.

Little Blue Birthday Box

2011-09-28T11:40:00.000-04:00

Anyone who know me knows that I make a big deal out of birthdays. PB laughs that I stretch my birthday out to a week with all the lunches and dinners with different groups of friends. I give the boys special "mama" presents on their birthdays, and I like to make sure they have a special cake. I wake them up on their birthday singing, and when they're older I will consider taking them out of school that day to do something special.

Why? I like to think that a birthday is a day to celebrate you. Yes, I love you 365 days a year, but that one day is about you being a special person. Not just one of the millions, not one of my two kids, or part of my family or one of my friends. You're always those. Your birthday is a reminder to me that I should show you how much I appreciate you. I think everyone deserves that for one day of the year. A showering of gifts, of unfettered love and adoration. The other 364 I expect humility, sharing, doing for others. Your birthday? Be a little selfish.

That's why I have no problem celebrating my own birthday. It's a matter of pride. I have lived a good 37 years. I've done a lot of different things that make me proud of my life. I've adventured, I've persevered, I've loved, lost and learned. And you know what? I look like krappe for 29, but for 37? Damn, I look good.

Anyway, I love a good celebration. I love special food, and dessert. I like buying and getting presents. To me? It's all just good fun. Picking out that one special thing you know the person will enjoy. The thrill of the hunt, and the anticipation of whether or not they'll love it as much as you do.

If you don't do birthdays, I understand. I never force people to celebrate. Ok, mostly. PB gets a cake whether or not he wants one because his birthday is in August, where there are no other holidays to celebrate. And I like ice cream cake. But if you won't enjoy getting or picking out a present I accept that. Don't bother. If the sentiments not there, it's not there. No need to force it.

And that's about it in a nutshell. Thanks to everyone who sent wishes my way, I am having a great birthday. PB and the boys spoil me everyday, and today was no exception. LG woke up at 2:am calling for me to wish me a happy birthday and ask if we could eat cupcakes.

Spin Cycle- Morals

2011-09-23T09:24:00.001-04:00

This week's Spin Cycle topic from Jen was "Morals". So I thought it was rather fitting that when I sat down at my computer this morning MSN had an article, "Should you teach your kids to cheat in sports?" Sometimes life just hands you blog fodder.

When I saw the title, I'm sure I had the same thought as 4 out of 5 parents. "Why is that even a question? Who would do that? This is why our country is in such big trouble, when our morals are so far into the toilet they couldn't even be plunged to the surface!" But the author makes a good point, in that many professionals "cheat" on a regular basis, and our kids can clearly see it when they watch those games. If your kid is trying to be just like his favorite sports legend (a questionable role model to begin with) he'll want to try some of their tactics. And it's up to the parents (gasp) to teach them that it's just not the way to do things.

I think there are a lot of areas in life where it can seem black and white, and yet we live in the grey. We don't steal, right? But if you realize your cashier didn't charge you for the $2.50 dish detergent, do you go all the way back to the store to pay? I mean, that's stealing, after all. Not intentional, but are intentions all that counts in morality? When you discover the mistake if you don't correct it, isn't that immoral, also?

But onward. To my chosen topic, which is, what do you teach the kids? I think we all tout the Golden Rule, do unto others. But do you really do it? I think we use it to teach kids the basics. Don't hit if you don't want to be hit. Don't bully if you don't want to be bullied. Don't steal, don't lie, don't be mean, and give some of those damn blocks to your brother before I knock you into next week. Oops, I mean, always share what you have. Basic, right, because that's what kids understand.

What about the stuff we teach about morals indirectly. Raise your hand if you kid has mimiced you swearing in traffic? Or said, "That's stupid/gay/retarted" or said "shut up" to a friend? You didn't teach them such intolerence, but they learned it from you. We know we're supposed to model good behaviors, but some times it's hard. Do you look away at people on the street (side note- who else cries when they hear Michael Jackson's "Man in the Mirror" and promises to be a better person until the next song comes on?) When you're friend or their kid has a fund raiser to do, do you give a little something because you want to encourage that kid to be charitable or do you swear softly under you breath because that's $10 you can't spend at Starbuck's next week?

You actually have to try to get a different message across. We give freely when we can. I'm not handing my kid the $10 to buy poppies because it's cute- I do it so he is part of the giving. I hope that when he's old enough he remembers that simple act and shakes the vets hand, thanks them and says, "No, I don't need change", too. Because I'm worried that too many kid will remember that their Mom said, "Oh, I don't have cash." or "I'll catch you on my way out." and not mean it. When we see someone in a wheel chair (which LG thinks are the coolest thing ever) I squish my initial urge to simply let that person be, and I let LG go tell them how much he likes their chair. It's the right thing to do, and he wants to do it. It's up to me to encourage that kind of stuff, or it might not always be that way. How much of our original morality wears off because of apathy (on the part of our parents, or teachers, or whoever else might have encouraged us but didn't.) I'm not saying a reward (I don't hand him $1 or anything). Just a smile and a "that was nice, LG, I'm happy you did that".

It's all about cutting through the krappe, the excuses, the lies and realizing that if we want to make the world a better place (thanks, Michael) it needs to start with us. You, me and our kids.

Random Tuesday Thoughts

2011-09-20T08:38:00.002-04:00

It's Tuesday, isn't it? Yeah, that's what I thought. Grab your coffee. Sit for a minute. I'll babble on nonsensically for a minute or two and you can feel all contected with the world.

-> My husband relayed a conversation between his boss and his boss' wife from the past weekend:

Wife: Are you listening? You haven't said a single word in reply.
Boss: I'm passive listening.
Wife: Passive listening?
Boss: Yeah, I'm sort of listening, but I'm doing the crossword, too.
Wife: That's not passive listening, that's being an a$$hole.

And now "passive listening" has entered our lexicon. Where it will be used often, as I frequently "passive listen" in meetings and sometimes while on the phone.

-> We have reached a new place in our parenting lives. The one where you really appreciate the fact that your kid can recognize that they feel ill and make it to the bathroom. It only backfired on me a little. We have a "no getting out of your bed at night" rule. Uhm, it's hard to explain when it's ok to break that rule. So during the day? We were aces (thank god, no 7 or 8 changes of clothes). At night? Well, that's why we have 3 separate sheet/blanket combos at close hand.

-> Little o with his uncle john and his new favorite gigantic alie. Best present ever. It's almost as big as he is.

-> Men are really big babies when they are sick. It's almost disgusting. I had the stomach bug two weeks ago. I only left work because I refuse to get that close to a toilet that is shared with co-workers. I went home and did some laundry and cleaned the bathrooms in between feeling horrible. LG had it last week. He sat quietly on the couch and learned that the magic mouse has more than just that silly club house show up his sleeve. We went food shopping, and to the post office (in between his episodes). PB was home yesterday. He spent the whole day in bed. Then he moved to the couch when we all got home. He occasionally moaned like a wounded buffalo. Really? The 3 year old took it better than he did? Sad.

-> Little o opening birthday presents in his birthday suit (almost). Why do something in clothes when you can do it mostly naked, right?

-> I watched the new 3 1/2 men last night. Now, except for his episode, I really like Charlie Sheen. I loved his character. I expected to hate the new one. But? It was actually pretty good. We'll see if it lasts.

-> Almost as if they had read my post last week (and all of your amazing responses), the WallStreetJournal had an article yesterday about how school districts are having a hard time financially meeting the needs of all the special needs kids. Not things like wheel chair ramps, or peanut free classrooms. Things like on-going home tutoring and video technology at the kids house (so they can do live feed video to be in class). The article sites that the largest growing population of special needs kids are the ones with "invisible ailments". The gist of the article is that schools are beginning to fight back and draw the line in the sand of what can reasonably be expected from a public school district. It will be interesting to see where it goes.

-> I should clarify my position, though. I completely understand that some kids need a little extra something to make school (or any public type thing) work. I'm all about a school, or a teacher working with parents to see it happen. I think the first focus should be how to help the kid acquire skills to make it happen on their own eventually. I'm against people thinking that the world owes them something and that other MUST accommodate their special birdie with expensive solutions. I'm even more against people who make excuses and do nothing to help the situation at all.

And so goes the Tuesday. I'm going to try to be productive now. You go do the same.

A ranting Spin

2011-09-16T11:45:00.001-04:00

This weeks Spin Cycle is Rules. And after thinking about "rules" for a bit, I might need to rant.

->If you believe that your child is a "special little snowflake" for any reason, please click away now. I mean any reason, ADD, spectrum disorder, food allergy, incredibly intelligent, or artistic or athletic. You especially need to click away if your child is "normal" but you think there are just too many rules for kids these days. Really, before the next paragraph starts. Cause I'm about to tell it like it should be.->

These days I'm a more than a little disgusted by how many parents think there are too many rules for children today. They have some issue or other, and the world needs to change its rotation to ensure that little Susie survives to adulthood and JackJack is nurtured by the entire village to his full blossoming potential. I'm seeing it more and more. Parents don't want rules in the classroom, or in public places. They want their children to be able to express themselves wherever they are, and they want people to recognize that each child is "different" and "special" in their own way. Everyone should love their child, and all its idiosyncrasies. Come on, admit it. If you're a parent, you've heard this 1,000 times in the last week alone.

Truth be told, that's a load of krappe. We are all more alike than not. And kids need to learn, at a nice early age, that the rules apply to ALL of us. Rules help us all function TOGETHER. In the classroom, being quiet and listening to the teacher is important. Standing nicely in line is important. You can't throw things, or bite people, screaming at non-screaming sanction times is frowned upon. I think it's great that your kid really expresses themselves well with clay, but they need to learn their ABCs and numbers, too. And so does my kid, in their class, who doesn't like clay. I'm tired of parents excusing their kids because they "just can't work within structure." They're little flower is "more creative than conformist".

What frustrates me is that I know a lot of parents (oh, and wait, I'm one of them) who are working their hardest to teach their kid how to function within the rules. Our kids aren't special, they're just kids. So when I hear that LG misbehaved and crawled under the stalls at bathroom time? LG and I talk about it, and why we don't do that. And why it's important to listen when the teacher tell us to stop. When the teacher tells me, "He's only 3, they all do stuff like that." it's not an excuse for me. I still need to teach my kid it's not right to use the bathroom as his own personal jungle gym. Coloring the walls with crayon instead of the paper isn't creative, it's testing boundaries. I tell him once it's against the rules. The next time? He gets a time out. That's how they learn to obey the rules. How did you feel the first time you got a big speeding ticket? Thought twice about going 55 in the school zone, right?

Throwing a fit because you want to go to the bathroom NOW and not when the teacher asked you 4 times when it was your turn 10 minutes ago? Yup, that's you trying to impose some control over your situation, I get it. But when you're 3 and at pre-school with 14 other kids? Not going to fly, especially if it happens every day. Yes, there is a kid in LGs class who does this. Every day. With the arms flinging and the kicking of the teacher. His Mom doesn't think it's a problem. Why can't the teacher just let him go when he wants to? The teacher's a control freak. She has never once considered what would happen if all the kids did this. Or what it's like to be a 3 year old waiting to go out on the playground while a classmate throws a fit, everyone watches the teacher get slapped and kicked, waits for the director to come deal with it and then finally gets to go out. She just thinks he has an independent spirit. He'll be a leader some day...

What happens to these kids when they get to the real world? There are no IEP's in college, or business. The judge isn't going to care if your Mom didn't think time outs were an effective way to discipline (side note- jail is really just a judge's version of time out, huh?) There are only so many jobs for artists and bmx bikers in the world, so I suspect your little special snowflake will need to learn to show up on time in a clean shirt and do what his boss tells him to do. How is making excuses and special provisions now going to help him later?

I'll admit that the first time LG uttered the words, "Because that's the rules, right Mama?" I was floored. He was 2, and I felt like it was a scene from 1984. And then I realized something. The kids who learn the rules early, and well, are the ones who can truly break them all when they get older. It's the people who see the boundaries, understand them and still boldly step over them that make a difference. Those are the great artists, and world leaders. Not obeying the rules when you don't understand them is criminal. Not obeying when you do is visionary.