Time again for "The Spin Cycle" (cue Twilight Zone music here)- where you only think you know what the hell I'm talking about. When I've befuddled you enough, go see Sprite's Keeper, and see what ghosts haunt her dreams at night...
I am a complete humbug about the paranormal. I don't believe in any of it. Ghosts, the sixth sense, fortunes, any of that schtuffs.
Last week I was watching that silly Ghost Hunter show (I didn't know where the remote was and was too lazy to put little o down to change the channel manually. Shut up.) PB came in, sat down and watched for about another 10 minutes. At which point this coversation happened,
"Ghosts? I never knew you believed in ghosts."
"So, this is as stupid to you as it is to me?"
"What the fact that the keep claiming to hear and see things that the camera isn't catching? That they're acting like they're all alone and frightened when we all know that there's a camera crew standing behind them? Yeah, it's pretty stupid. I want popcorn."
"I'll find the remote and take O. You make popcorn."
See, I don't get it. There are logical explanations for almost all the "paranormal" things people experience. It just seems silly to me. And if it is real, shows like this one would make any sane ghost turn to the dark side (though this one was supposed to be set in an asylum in Pennsylvania, so maybe it was the insane ghosts trying to get messages through ineffectively?)
As for that "sixth sense", to me it's common sense. Two year old playing quietly in the other room? Look for the scissors and the cat, quick. That's not extra sensory perception. That's taking a second to think about reality. It's like the "don't go down in the basement" rule. It's not ESP to know that monsters hide in the basement. It's common knowledge that seems to elude most blond horror flick chicks. People who have "ESP" just pay closer attention that the rest of us, I think.
When I heard weird noises in the basement? I immediately wondered what was trying to burrow into the house, not if someone died in it 100 years ago and wanted my attention. Never once have I thought my parents stuck around to try to get a message to me (though on occasion I imagine my Mom laughing at my me when LG is being particularly surly).
I have been known to have my palm or tarot read at a Renaissance Faire or two, but that's more for the experience than the information provided. (Oh, and if I live past 60? I'm going to find the palm reader and ask for a refund).
And I'm not too big to admit that I've experienced deja` vu. That sense that I've done something before and I know I haven't. I chalk that up to my own insanity, though. My mind isn't above screwing with me just for fun. It does get bored from lack of use, after all.
Here's my caveat, though (no fine print required). If I lived 100 years ago, I would totally believe all this stuff. Ghosts, ESP, all of it. But the minute science stepped in and starting disproving most of it? I was done. Even the stuff we can't explain right now? Give it another 100 years. Fewer and fewer mysteries.
But, by all means, if you believe in this stuff, I support you 100%. Maybe I'm just not in tune to my
inner scarf and patchouli wearing swami feelings or something. Don't give me dirty looks if I giggle at your seance, though. I just showed up for the free wine.